My Truth

I’m not okay!

I’m struggling; to wake up in the morning.

I’m struggling; to keep portraying my chosen character.

I’m struggling; to find hope amidst all the chaos.

I’m struggling; to believe that I matter.

I’m struggling; to continue living my life.

I’m struggling; to breathe.

I want to give up.

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Daily Struggle 

She was like a drowning person, flailing, reaching for anything that might save her. Her life was an urgent, desperate struggle to justify her life. ~ Jonathan Safran Foer

I fight a long and tiring battle everyday. It is exhausting. It leaves me physically ill. It makes me feel weak. 

By the end of it I am left vulnerable and exposed. 

Sometimes, I just want to blank everything out. Other times, I want to grab an eraser and wipe away this existence. During those rare moments of utter defeat, I just want to be invisible. 

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Seeking Clarity Amidst Chaos

It’s been six months since I quit my job and returned home. So far, it’s been an up and down ride.

On the positive front, I’m healthy and mostly free of illness, I’ve lost 10 kg since June, my bestie & I have become super close and I finally started this blog.

On the negative front, there were a lot of fights at home, depression struck again and my dad & I no longer speak to each other.

It has definitely been an interesting ride.

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